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Finding inner peace...is it really possible?

10/19/2016

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Finding inner peace in the modern world is a significant challenge. Everything about modern society feels like an obstacle to experiencing peace of mind. But there are ways to find and maintain inner peace. Inner peace is a choice, and many of your habits determine how much peace you experience in your daily life.
 
Experience inner peace and enjoy life on a deeper, more satisfying level:

1) Focus your attention on those things you can control.  I can be a tall order when there is so much that is worrisome happening in the world around us.  However, it is not productive to worry about things you can’t control. 
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I am reminded of the Serenity Prayer:
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If you find yourself worrying, ask yourself, “Is this something I can control? Will worrying be beneficial in any way?”  Instead, shift your thoughts to the outcome that you desire and that would give you peace.  Either way, you are just thinking – you may as well think about the outcome that gives you peace vs. worry!
 
2) Spend time in nature. It has been proven that exposure to nature ignites physiological change that lowers stress, calms the mind, and clears the senses. Take a long walk in the park or spend a weekend camping. You’ll feel dramatically different compared to sitting in a building 24 hours every day. There’s something peaceful about spending time among the birds and the trees.

3) Be true to yourself. Few things are more disconcerting than living a life you weren’t meant to live. It can show itself with stress, discontent, anxiety, depression, and physical ailments.   Live a life that’s authentic and aligns with your values. 

It’s too easy to allow society dictate your choices. You don’t have to spend your life on a career that’s impressive to others. You don’t have to chase after a fancy house. Make your own decisions about what’s most important to you.

4) Eat nutritiously. You might not realize how bad you feel because you’re so used to it. Try eating the way you know you should for just a week. Note the change in how you feel. 
Chances are, when go back to the junk food and you’ll see your mood and your overall sense of well-being lower.  Everything has a vibration – including you, including your food.  Junk food has a lower vibration than whole/fresh food. There’s a lot to be said about the old adage “you are what you eat!”  It is true…your body’s energetic vibration will align with the vibration of the food you eat.  The higher vibration, the better you feel!
 
5) Exercise regularly. Have you ever noticed how great you feel as you’re walking out of the gym? Exercise feels good, and you feel good about yourself for doing it.  Find some sort of exercise that you enjoy and make it a point to get out there and do it at least 3-4 times a week.

6) Do something nice for someone else. This is a great way to take your focus off of yourself. You become more aware that others are struggling, too. When you are kind, you receive kindness in return. You’ll also feel a sense of pride and satisfaction when you help someone else.

7) Set honest about your needs. Be open and forward with your needs and desires.  You may be wishing that your kids would unload the dishwasher or your spouse would put the cap on the toothpaste.  Meanwhile, that is not even on their radar.  Be sure that you are communicating your needs with the people around you. You’re not only more likely to get what you want, but you’ll also feel more in control of your life. Being passive results in having less control, which runs counter to inner peace. Be assertive without being aggressive.

8) Meditate. Meditation is calming. It also helps to see life and its challenges more accurately. Things are often better than they seem. Meditation can prevent your mind from making a situation seem worse than it really is.  Find it difficult to meditate?  See our tips here – or scroll YouTube for a guided meditation that interests you.  Spending as little as 5 minutes focusing on your breathing or switching your thoughts to something peaceful can be enough!

9) Avoid trying to change others. Believe it or not, this is a very common mistake many of my clients make.  The fact is, you CANNOT change anyone!  Period.  It’s hard enough to change yourself...don't waste your precious energy on trying to change someone else! 

It’s important to take care of yourself mentally and physically. Eat properly, exercise, and be true to yourself. Be assertive and take control of your life. All the accomplishments in the world can’t replace inner peace. Avoid chasing after those things that society has determined to be important. Decide for yourself and live the life you were meant to live. 
 
As my wise son says, “You do you, Mom!”  So, to all you amazing folks out there…YOU DO YOU!  Being true to yourself is the greatest way to find inner peace, but we often need steps to get there.  Hope you found this helpful!  New Moon Self-Development Center coaching is always here if you need any help along the way. :)
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10 Powerful Ways to Overcome Fear and Anxiety

10/9/2016

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Americans are experiencing an unprecedented amount of turmoil and division with our upcoming presidential election.  Fear from both sides of the ticket is rampant and people are on edge. 
 
One of the curses of being able to think and reason is the ability to feel fear and anxiety, even when neither are warranted. Fear and anxiety can serve as helpful cues that there may be a situation that deserves caution, but after this is accomplished, they actually cause more harm than good.
 
The reality is that you create your own fear and anxiety. The good news is, if you can create your fear and anxiety, you can also create your own peace and serenity.
 
Choose to minimize the effects of fear and anxiety in your life:

1. Breathing is the fastest way to derail fear and anxiety. When faced with fearful thoughts or situations, we begin breathing quickly and shallowly. This begins a cascade of physiological events that result in feelings of fear and anxiety. It’s possible to circumvent this process by breathing deeply and slowly. 

Try breathing quickly and shallowly for 60 seconds and see how you feel. Now try breathing slower and deeper. Notice the differences.

2. Act normally. Continue behaving as you would if there were nothing to fear. You can communicate to the fearful part of yourself that everything is okay. Bring yourself back to the present moment.  Look around you – has anything changed? Realize that you are safe. To act normally, remove yourself from the stimulus that is causing the fear response and simply begin to do your daily tasks. If you can act as if everything is fine, your brain will begin to believe it.

3. Spend time with supportive friends and family. A night on the town can work wonders to relieve stress and anxiety. A long, meaningful talk over a cup of coffee can be very beneficial.

4. Have positive expectations. Fear and anxiety are the result of expecting the worst. When you expect the best, you can’t feel afraid. Always shift your thoughts to what you WANT to happen.  Let’s face it, no one can tell the future.  Instead of visualizing the worst case scenario and causing yourself stress, visualize the best case scenario and feel yourself shift out of the fear reaction.

5. Let it go. It’s common for fear and anxiety in one part of your life to bleed over into other parts of your life. A rough morning meeting with the boss could ruin the rest of your day if you let it. Once the event is over, decide to let it go and move on. Put your fearful thought in an imaginary balloon and let it go.  Watch with relief as the balloon floats out of you sight.  Now get on with things.

6. Sweat. The chemicals that your body releases during times of fear and anxiety can last quite a while. One easy way to get rid of them is to exercise. Work up a sweat and watch your fear and anxiety melt away. This is also a much healthier way to deal with unpleasant feelings than drugs, alcohol, or overeating.

7. Reward yourself. After dealing successfully with a challenging situation, celebrate. This will help teach your brain that these stressful situations have a positive outcome. Buy yourself something small or do something enjoyable. Anything that puts you in a good mood is a good choice.

8. Take action. If you’re worried, do something to resolve the source of your worry. By taking action, you’re taking responsibility. You also become more focused on your plan, which takes your mind away from your worries. The more you do to resolve the situation, the less fear and anxiety you’ll feel.

9. Distract yourself. Sometimes there’s nothing you can do about the situation. In those cases, distractions can provide relief. Ensure that your distractions are positive, such as reading something beneficial or getting some exercise. At the very least, avoid distractions that are unhealthy or lead to additional challenges.

10. Use positive affirmations. Keep your mind focused on positive thoughts by saying positive things to yourself. How you talk to yourself affects your mood and experience. 

Fear and anxiety can be crippling if allowed to go too far. There are many techniques for minimizing these negative emotions. Those that feel fear and anxiety on a regular basis are experts at generating these feelings.
 
Become an expert at generating feelings of peace and comfort, instead. It just takes practice.  New Moon Self-Development can help with tools to release fear and anxiety and take control of your thoughts.  Contact us at karen@newmoonselfdevelopment.com for more information.

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How to Use Self-Experimentation to Enhance Your Life

10/4/2016

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Creating change and momentum in your life
It can be difficult to change your life. There’s so much uncertainty and potential failure that sometimes it can feel unsafe to try.  But what if you could view your life as a science experiment of sorts? You wouldn’t take the results personally. You’d just be a scientist observing the outcome. You could simply judge the results and plan your next step.
 
The idea of self-experimentation has several benefits:

  • It removes the possibility of failure. You’re testing the effectiveness of an idea, possibly someone else’s idea…you’re not testing yourself!

  • You’re actively attempting to enhance your life. You have a goal and a plan to achieve it. You’re taking action.

  • You analyze the results of your experiment and then, once you know what works for you (and what doesn't), tweak your actions move even closer to your goal. What could be more effective than this?
 
Experiment in your life, be curious, and enjoy the process of discovery:

1)  Choose a theory or two that you’d like to test. There’s plenty of self-help advice to be found. Find an interesting theory and test it. Pick out a money-making program or a workout program.  Try eating vegetarian, eliminating gluten, or test out the health benefits of “oil pulling.” Find something that interests you and has the potential to impact your life in a positive way.
  • Other ideas include diets, changing sleep patterns, dropping a bad habit or adding a new/positive one, meditating, fasting, [ahem…shameless plug] releasing emotional blocks using clay [ahem], or anything else you can think of.
  • You can use someone else’s plan or develop your own. What interests you the most? Educate yourself by actually measuring your own results before and after.

2) Learn what you need to know. Get the necessary materials and map out your plan. For fun, write down your predictions of how it will work out.  (Keep in mind, however, that we are doing this to make positive change, so go into this experiment with positive expectations and keep an open mind.  The placebo effect has been proven over and over – if you believe it won’t work…it won’t.) 
 
For example, imagine that you want to see what will happen if you limit yourself to 100 grams of carbohydrates per day. You decide to:

  • Track your carbohydrates, body weight, blood pressure, mood, and waistline.

  • You commit to sticking with the diet for four weeks and taking measurements before you begin and after each completed week.

  • You theorize that you might be hungry and tired at first, but expect those symptoms will disappear after the first week.

  • You predict that you will to lose 3 pounds per week and lose inches off your waist.

  1. Put your hypothesis to the test. Perform the experiment on yourself. Follow your plan and see what happens. Find out if you were right or wrong in your predictions.

  2. Evaluate your data and formulate a conclusion. What did you learn? Could you tweak the process to improve it? Or was it a horrible idea that deserves no further investigation?

  3. Consider the next step. What do you want to do next? Do you want to continue down the same path or choose a completely different topic?
 
Do you have a hard time making changes in your life? Try viewing aspects of your life through the eyes of a scientist. Be the witness. Create your theory and test it:

  • Will making 10 prospect calls each week guarantee an appointment with a client? Who knows? Put it to the test and find out.

  • Can you do one additional push-up each day until you’ve reached 100 push-ups? Find out.

  • Will dressing more professionally at work result in receiving more respect? Dress up every day for a month and see.
 
There’s no reason to wonder. You have yourself to experiment upon. You can find out definitively what does and doesn’t work for you. Imagine all the incredible changes you could make after a couple of years of living this way!

What is your experiment going to be?  Please share...it will be interesting to see how our experiments go!
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    Karen LoGiudice is a personal growth coach seeking to help people live their very best lives.  With 12 year of coaching experience, she provides holistic information and tools to clients worldwide.

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